Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Want. Wantwantwantwantwant.

For whatever reason, all the websites that I use to download episodes of TV on the shifty as they air in the US instead of waiting for them to finally reach Australia seem to think I'm a spotty, nerdy boy living in my mother's basement. Adverts tell me all about virtual girls that want to dance on my desktop in their underwear, lots and lots of women think I live in Adelaide and keep asking me if there's any good things to do there. And apparently, Russian women are very very attracted to me. They will actively message me, and try to marry me, according to the ads.

Now obviously, I have no real need for virtual girls dancing on my desktop* and I don't live in Adelaide (though sometimes I feel like messaging them to tell them to go to The Woolshed) and although Tasmania is apparently about to legalise gay marriage, I neither want or need a Russian bride. What I both want and need though was the dress that one of them was wearing in one of the ads.

"Soulful" (their word, not mine) Russian Lady, if I marry you, I get half of that dress right? Please?

Would it be wrong to just lead her on till she tells me where she got it from? I'm not sure on the morals of dealing with Russian mail order brides and their wardrobes.

On a similar note, for anyone who has seen the new season opener of Castle, I want the leather jacket that Martha is wearing at the hospital. Really really badly.

*when I was younger, I not only had a sheep that ran around, but a tiny 30pixel square movie player that ran next to the clock. You would make your own movies in gif format and then play them in the corner. I made a 15 minute tetris loop. I had lots of spare time. This was on Windows 95. I wonder if you can get one for 7?


  1. I strongly suspect that particular Russian Bride doesn't exist so it's possible the dress is virtual too...

    I reckon you could whip one of those up easily!

  2. I, too, think you could make the dress .. but you can always go for the bride and see if the dress comes with her.